SUBLIME AND RIDICULOUS..

It`s been a difficult couple of days with the untimely loss of two great sporting heroes.   First we had the passing of Sir Henry Cooper, `Our `Enery,` a national treasure admired and respected for his boxing prowess but also for his humility, his courtesy and his unfailing decency.

And yesterday morning the news broke that Seve Ballesteros had left us at the age of just 54.   It really doesn`t seem fair that one so talented, so personable and so loved should pass away so young.   There are rightly so many things written and said about him that it`s difficult to add to them without appearing mawkish, but he will forever stay in my thoughts for a very good reason.

As one of the world`s worst golfers, I took the advice of a more accomplished friend who gave me a useful golfing tip.   "When you do your backswing, say to yourself `Severiano,` and when you do the downswing, say `Ballesteros` and that way you won`t hurry through the shot."   Well, I`m not sure it made much difference because just one of the many differences between people like Seve and me is that Seve played golf and I just hack golf balls around.   But I still inwardly chant his name to myself and will do so with even more reverence now that he`s gone.

And so we have said `Goodbye` to two supreme sportsmen who were masters of their profession, sublime in manner, bringing a smile to our hearts and memories that will linger. 

So where`s the ridiculous in all this?  Well, yesterday I went to St. Mary`s to see the Saints` last game of the season (a 3-1 win to secure promotion before an assembly of 31,635) and on the journey home, I surfed the airwaves for some evening entertainment on my 120 mile journey.   I happened across Radio Five Live and their 606 football phone-in programme.  In the depths of winter this was `hosted` by Alan Green, he who is never wrong, but last night it was the turn of joint hosts Mark Chapman and, of all people, Robbie Savage.

I`ve no problem with `Chappers,` who seems a jovial enough chap but I couldn`t quite understand what Savage was doing there - neither, I suspect, could Chappers.   It turned out that yesterday afternoon, Savage had played his last ever game for Derby County and  the BBC had lined up a succession of numbskulls who dutifully rang in to thank Savage for his contribution to the beautiful game and to heap cringing praise and good wishes for his future.

Now, Savage has made a very good living out of football with his limited abilities both as a player and as a role model for any youngsters watching who might want to grow up to be a belligerent, disdainful bruiser with an eye for the main chance.  So it was no surprise to hear that his radio persona accurately reflected that of his playing days.   He was virtually unintelligible, belligerent to callers who had an opinion different from his own and disdainful of any criticism.  

In short, an object lesson in self-preservation and self aggrandizement and predictably lacking even a whiff of dignity, style or modesty.   Later in the evening Sky Sports showed the bizarre spectacle of this grotesque poseur stripping off most of his kit and ceremoniously handing it to grateful spectators at the Madjeski, although quite why anyone would wish to cherish a pair of his soiled and discarded football shorts remains one of life`s compelling mysteries.

All of which made me wonder whether the BBC had now completely lost any sense of reason by hiring this charmless chancer at licence payers expense to embark on a broadcasting career, having said goodbye to professional football.   But it did serve at least one useful purpose, for the sublime qualities of `Our `Enery` and the incomparable Seve were brought into sharp relief with the stumbling ineptitude of the ridiculous Robbie Savage, thus confirming their respective status in the hearts and minds of the sporting public. 

No contest.  Some goodbyes, you see, are heartfelt and sincere.   Others are met with a sigh of relief.