COUNTING THE PENNIES?

There`s a lot of fuss going on right now about MPs salaries with the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority suggesting a  rise from £66,000 to £74,000 a year.   By and large, the public reaction has been one of outrage that these freeloading chancers should grab yet more taxpayers` cash for what seems to be a part time job (they`ve just packed up from Parliament until September.)  And some MPs, Ministers and others have baulked at the idea of being paid more, ever sensitive to the feelings of their constituents, many of whom continue to struggle in difficult financial times.

And you might expect me to join the clamorous throng and add my indignation and objection to such a harebrained wheeze.   But wait.   Maybe I`m mellowing a bit.   Maybe I`m getting more philosophical in my advancing dotage.   Or maybe, just maybe, there is an example of genuinely grotesque excess that makes the proposals for MPs salaries seem not only modest but quite possibly reasonable.

And we need look no further than the parallel universe of Premier League football for our example.   It seems that Wayne Rooney is dischuffed about not being the main man at Manchester United any more and may be on his way out of Old Trafford.   He is reported as being on a wage of £250,000 each and every week with his modest income boosted by image rights, sponsorship, appearances and, yes, even a book deal - the notion of Wayne Rooney writing anything other than a formal transfer request is indeed one to stretch the imagination.   

And so all the while grotesque excesses such as Rooney and the rest of the inhabitants of that far off, distant Premier League planet are indulged, I find it hard to complain about a proposal that would see MPs receive in a whole year what Mr. Rooney and his ilk are paid in a matter of hours.   I guess it`s called perspective?

SNOPPER`S SUNDAY ROAST..

Listening to the news and reading newspapers, it`s a job to know where to begin. In a week of news that stifles optimism, the highlights have been:-

- democracy gasping for breath as the Irish Referendum on the Lisbon Treaty allegedly resulted in an overwhelming `Yes.` For me the result is actually underwhelming not of itself, although I think that now the Irish have voted twice and it`s 1-1 after extra time, there might be a case for a jump off against the clock, but because it highlights once again the disregard for the democractic process by the clunking fist of Gordon Brown. Now I don`t have a problem with `authority` as such, as long as it is fair, reasonable and democratic. But I sure as hell have a problem with `authority` when it is unfair, unreasonable and plainly undemocratic. We were promised a referendum which was denied to us by an unelected Prime Minister and I find his refusal to honour democracy not only deceitful but also deeply offensive;

- delusions of adequacy coming to the fore once more in the form of Tony Blair, who is apparently the front runner for the Presidency of the EU. I imagined, in my crushing naivety, that Presidents of countries, never mind continents, should by and large be upright, honest, decent people who can set an example and inspire confidence in those over whom they preside. So how come we are likely to get a warmongering, sycophantic, self-serving, lying- through-his-teeth, grandiose poseur? Oh, of course, it`s the EU we`re dealing with, where it takes one to know one;

- sorry seems to be the hardest word if you`re `Sir` Alex Ferguson. He has issued a statement which is little more than getting his retaliation in first before the FA consider what action, if any, to take following yet another loudmouthed outburst against match officials. The statement was apparently issued via the Manchester United tv channel for which one has to pay a subscription to view and which one is unlikely to view anyway unless one is a Manchester United fan - preaching to the converted, I think it`s called. I just hope the FA take strong action, for unless they do then the football world will continue to be bullied by this serial offender. But I`ll believe it when I see it.

So is there any consolation to be found? I could go on as there is so much more to dull the senses and depress the spirit, but despite the rantings of the insufferable Ferguson, I have, like Albert Camus, found some small solace in the world of proper football where, on a dark and wet Friday evening, the Saints overcame the shrimpers of Southend and so take a giant leap towards respectability. What was it Camus said? Oh yes, "All that I know most surely about morality and obligations, I owe to football." They should put a sign saying that on the walls of Old Trafford and Soho Square.

Enjoy your Sunday.