IF ONLY..

I make no apology for focussing once more on the rise and rise of our street`s gay icon pacy flanker Scott ("Buzzin") Wagstaff, for once more he has lifted the autumnal gloom, this time by netting the winning goal in Charlton`s televised encounter away at MK Dons last evening.

Following a particularly depressing episode of Emmerdale Farm and an even more angst ridden EastEnders, it was indeed a relief to switch over to Sky Sports and watch this Johnstones Paint Trophy Southern Area Round Two encounter played out in front of just over 3,000 hardy souls in Milton Keynes, the Gorky of Buckinghamshire. As to the game itself and pacy flanker`s contribution, I can perhaps do no better than repeat the remarks made this morning by my good friend and neighbour Hurting Even More Than Ever of Leybourne, who said this in a comment on the next article down from this one:-

"And gay icon six pack buzzin` Waggy has just lifted the Tuesday night gloom with yet another goal and post match interview. Parky (Charlton`s manager Phil Parkinson) describes him as one of the best athletes he`s ever worked with. So, Parky, keep him in the side. He`ll keep improving. All gay icon needs now is a decent agent. Oh, how he must regret turning down Snopper and Slightly."

Waggy`s career is clearly on an upward path and he`s now Charlton`s top scorer with five goals from nine starts. He is developing into every manager`s dream of an archetypal player. He has a good engine, gets from box to box, has an eye for a pass, gets wide, tracks back, gets to the byeline, takes on defenders and has now added the goalscoring touch to his burgeoning repertoire. And we`re all very happy for him and his engaging family.

So it`s all very positive on the playing front but Slightly (who has morphed into HEMTEoL following the Gills` descent into serial abject failure) does have a point concerning Waggy`s off-field activities. If only he had taken up the offer that Slightly and I made a season or so ago to become his joint agents, he would now be in the comforting care of two men of the world, men of substance who have been there, done it and lived to tell the tale - the SAS of football agency. We would have ensured that, as Wayne Rooney`s star is on the wane, Waggy`s recent rise would see him well placed to take Rooney`s mantle as a worldwide icon, rather than one who is recognised only in the back streets of south east London or the sylvan lanes of the Garden of England. TV appearances, product endorsements, book deals, even an end to tongue-in-cheek ironic name tags - all this and more could have been his. If only. But there it is. Life, like football, is a game of two halves, a marathon not a sprint and at the end of the day it may be time for Slightly and me to draw a line in the sand and move on from the rejection we suffered all those months ago when Waggy turned us down. But we know it could all have been so very different. To be fair.