I`m finding it difficult to curb my enthusiasm but there is an upcoming election hereabouts due to the resignation of a local councillor from whom we never heard anything.  The usual suspects are being dusted off and presented to the electorate in all their finery via leaflets and campaigning on the local village F***book page. I`ve even had one banging on my door this morning, such is their apparent desperation.

They are vying for a seat on the local Borough Council and the mere fact that one gets elected to the vacancy immediately means that the successful candidate is entitled to a minimum allowance of at least £5,000 a year plus `expenses` just for turning up.   There are as many as 54 Borough councillors so the annual bill for the council taxpayers is pretty hefty and it gets even bigger when councillors become chairpeople or vicechairpeople of the myriad committees, for which they receive increased `allowances` - the self styled `leader of the council` gets £20,000 a year minimum so questions surrounding value for money become relevant.

Anyway, I`ve had a look at the candidates and they all represent either Conservative, Liberal Democratic, Green or Labour - all very predictable.   Trouble is, the Conservatives already have a stonking majority and so even if you aren`t an aficionado of theirs and you feel inclined to vote for someone else it`s not going to make any difference to the way the council behaves.  Around here Conservative votes tend to be weighed rather than counted.

So it`s all a bit pointless, to be fair.  Could even be a case of `None of the Above.`  I`m thinking about it.

 

NOT TODAY THANK YOU...

Today is election day here in our Kentish enclave.  We are being invited to vote for candidates for the County Council and also, of all things, the County`s Police and Crime Commissioner.  To help this process along, the village hall has been commandeered for the day and the polling station there opened at 7.00am this morning and will go on until 10.00pm this evening - so plenty of time although I feel for the staff at the polling station who will have a long 15 hours of it.

Once upon a time in a former life I had some things to do with elections and all the paraphernalia that went with them - the stubby pencils, the red tape and sealing wax, the strict formality of it all.  Indeed, on one occasion I was appointed Presiding Officer at a remote hamlet in deepest Surrey which had a population of about 50.  I put in the 15 hour shift despite the fact that the vast majority of the residents had cast their votes by about mid afternoon.

Now I accept that General Elections and the odd referendum are events which should be taken seriously and the democratic right to vote should be observed but somehow I can`t quite take the County Council or the Police and Crime Commissioner thing as seriously as perhaps I should.  Maybe as my decline accelerates, my cynicism increases.  But the fact is that almost every aspect of our lives is governed by politics and that`s a pity.

The County Council comes across as a remote organisation, perhaps too big to be genuinely close to those for whom it is there to serve and who, of course, pay its way.  I have a good deal of admiration for the staff of the County Council who, being Council Tax payers themselves, are doubtless aware of the need for efficiency and commitment to the cause.  But the problem seems to be the elected members - too many of them, costing a fortune in expenses and allowances and concerned with the maintenance of their status...and we only ever hear from them when elections come around every few years.  Arguably more interested in the politics than the job at hand.

As for the Police and Crime bod, that is also a political position;  the candidates for us to choose from today are from each of the three main political parties.  Now one would think that an experienced and thoroughly professional Chief Constable would be more than capable of securing his annual budget and submitting an annual report on priorities and performance to a small independent panel, rather than be beholden to a political appointee.  Well, that`s what used to happen in olden times but those arrangements were not political enough for the politicians.

I speak with the experience of being a victim of politicisation.  In yet another former life I was approached to become a governor of a couple of local schools - a primary and a secondary - the head teachers having nominated me on the assumption that my experience at the time might prove useful.  I accepted, enjoyed the role and for a while things went very well.  Until one evening I had a phone call from a Labour Party `whip` in County Hall to tell me that my services were no longer required.  Thank you and goodnight.  Problem was that I was (and still am) politically ambivalent.

So, perhaps for the first time ever, I will decline the chance to go and vote for two `offices` neither of which inspire any degree of confidence, identity or direct relevance, save for the fact that together they are costing me a four figure sum each year and there`s nothing I can do about that or the clinging grasp that politics has over our lives.

Not today thank you.

It comes to something when yet another defeat for my beloved Saints contributes to a feeling of light relief.  But yesterday`s battling performance away at Manchester City (again) proved that there might be some hope after all that the team can yet redeem themselves from the 9-0 hammering at the hands of Leicester City just over a week ago.   Yesterday the Saints held a 1-0 lead deep into the second half until two late goals from the current champions meant that once again the Saints came away empty handed and remain stuck in the relegation zone.   But, whilst it`s true that it is the hope that kills you, it still springs eternal and the signs are encouraging.

But I found myself once again looking for genuine relief in sport from the awful prospect of six weeks of electioneering by a bunch of politicians on all sides who do not deserve to be taken seriously.  I`m already tired of being shouted at, lied to and being told what to think not only by the politicians of this world but also the alleged impartial media.

So anything to get away from all that is welcome in the next few weeks and to be fair although England losing the World Cup Rugby Final to South Africa was disappointing at least it was a fair result in a sport where respect for officials and their decisions is paramount.

In other news, despite our street`s local hero getting booked again, Wimbledon salvaged a point in a 1-1 home draw against Lincoln City - a result which takes them out of their own relegation zone.  Forest Green Rovers went top of their league with yet another away win and it would indeed be a remarkable thing for a village team from nowhere if, at the end of the season, they gain promotion again, this time to League One.

Not so good elsewhere.  Gillingham went down 3-0 at home to Rotherham, much to my neighbours disquiet;  Maidstone lost 2-1 away and both Fort William and Truro City fell victims to the weather with both of their games called off due to waterlogged pitches.

I`ve said it before, I know, but if sport used to be the last refuge for those who find it impossible to idle, perhaps it is now the first point of refuge for those who cannot stand the lunacy of the hustings?

Sure is.   Maybe it`s the time of the year or maybe, as I get older, the events of the year become less and less appealing.  Maybe it`s just me but as darkness descends in late afternoon and the first frosts of winter arrive on cold easterly winds I find myself looking at what is in store for us over the next few weeks and months.

And what a depressing prospect it is.  To get arguably the most painful issue out of the way and done with first, I have so far received no response to my appeal on the village web page for help from a local psychoanalyst to provide some much needed counselling following the Saints embarrassing drubbing at the hands of Leicester City last Friday.  It didn`t get any better last night as they went down to a 3-1  Cup defeat away at Manchester City and they now face the prospect of yet another morale crushing encounter at the Etihad in a league match this coming Saturday.   Next week I might reach crisis point.

And before us lies a series of events, some trivial, some downright ridiculous, others simply irksome -  I leave you to decide which is which..  They begin tomorrow night with the imported nonsense of Halloween when kids roam the streets, knock on doors and demand to be given treats or else.  Then comes Bonfire Night, celebrating the failed attempt to blow up Parliament about 400 years ago (it would make more sense to celebrate a successful attempt to blow up Parliament?)  Trouble is, with all the banging and crashing, out faithful Golden retriever will probably go bonkers and we will have yet another disturbed night.

Then the prospect of yet another General Election in early December.  I don`t know about you but I am heartily tired of politics and especially the politicians who have behaved quite abominably over the past three and a bit years in their dismal failure to carry out the `instruction` they were given by the majority of electors to sensibly arrange an orderly departure from the oppressive clutches of the European Union.   The General Election campaign got off the ground this morning and already I am tired of hearing yet more lies disguised as party manifestos and spending pledges.

After that you would think that Christmas would come as light relief but sadly it is nowadays little more than another excuse for a commercial bonanza which has lost all sense of the true meaning of Christmas which, as Bart Simpson recalled, is when we all come together to celebrate Santa`s birthday.  Ho ho ho !!

And then it`s New Year`s Day and yet more banging, crashing and Retriever meltdown.

You can tell I`ve not had a good time lately - a streaming cold and hacking cough (aka man `flu,) four visits to the dentist in the last couple of weeks, a visit to the optician to get a prescription for new glasses following cataract operations and the onset of my Seasonal Affective Disorder (SADness.)

But I must pull myself together, count my blessings, put on a brave face with a stiff upper lip and face the coming period with more optimism and hope.  It would help if England win the Rugby World Cup on Saturday and the Saints manage to turn their current slough of despond into the sunny uplands of Premier League survival but maybe that is asking just too much of a troublesome world.

Have a nice day!

SPOILT FOR CHOICE...

Don`t know about you but already, with three weeks to go, I`ve had enough of the General Election campaigning.  There`s the old saying about statistics, of course - you know the one - lies, damned lies and statistics - and the more I hear from our campaigning politicians the more it seems there are lies, damned lies and election campaigns.

We seem to be spoilt for choice this time round between a mixed assortment of party leaders.  The Labour Party is rumoured to be led by Jeremy Corbyn.  Now I would have thought that anyone who was once the alleged paramour of Diane Abbott is automatically barred from holding any responsible position. 

Then there is one Tim Farron, who found himself leader of the Liberal Democrats who are so democratic that they want to reverse the democratic decision of the majority of voters and crawl back on bended knee into the European Union.   Oh, and they want to legalise cannabis.  Of course they do.  Maybe when Tim`s gap year is over he`ll think differently.

The Green Party always intrigue me.  Until last year they had a Leader, Natalie Bennett, who was Australian and barely comprehensible.  She apparently supports polygamy and doing away with the monarchy whilst the current leadership want to legalise prostitution. Sounds par for the green course. The current leadership is held jointly by Caroline Lucas and Jonathan Bartley, presumably because the membership couldn`t decide which one to choose or maybe they were worried about inflicting mental health issues on whichever one was rejected.   Bartley`s claim to fame seems to be that he had an uncle who was married to Deborah Kerr, whereas Lucas unfathomably escaped prosecution for obstructing the highway during the Balcombe anti- fracking demonstrations a couple of years ago.

Which leaves the Conservatives, UKIP and any other even more bonkers parties that may emerge from the woodwork.   The Tories are now led by Theresa May, who seems to be Maggie Thatcher without the handbag (yet) and UKIP are currently led by Paul Nuttall who reminds me more and more of Peter Kay.  Their mission is surely accomplished, job done and our democratically arrived at decision to leave the EU can surely be left in the hands of David Davis, Liam Fox, Boris Johnson and their chums.  Well, it can can`t it?

I`m thinking of starting The Football Party, led by Matthew Le Tissier, when everything will be decided  over 90 minutes plus stoppage time at Wembley.  It might be just as sensible..........

IS IT ANY WONDER ?

They say a picture paints a thousand words and this one just about sums up today here in deepest Kent, where we have all the fun of yet another election - this time for the Kent County Council.

Now I have to be careful what I say here not least because at least one good friend is gainfully employed by KCC.   But it always strikes me that any county council is stuck between a rock and a hard place - between the central government and more local councils such as districts and parishes.  The central government and all its doings arouse passionate debate about national and international affairs, whilst district and especially parish councils are concerned with the more local issues that affect out daily lives.

All of which suggests that county councils, whilst perhaps largely and unfairly perceived, are thought of as a bit remote and, of course, like most politicians, theirs share a tendency for us voters to hear from them only at election time.

My personal insider knowledge of Kent County Council is limited to the time when, in a former life over half a century ago, I worked in `administration` at the office of the County Clerk.  I had just finished my national service and was pretty desperate for a job to support both myself and the fragrant, recently betrothed Mrs. Snopper and so I was grateful for the opportunity presented by KCC. 

But the experience left me with a jaundiced view of life in the marbled halls of County Hall.  I would dictate a letter to a comely shorthand typist, get it back, make sure it was OK and then initial the carbon copy, whereupon it was passed on to two other more senior administrators who would themselves initial the carbon copy before the stamped signature of the county clerk himself (one GT Heckels) would be applied.  That stultifying, almost Dickensian regime, coupled with my penchant for minor rebellion, ensured that my tenure at county hall was understandably short lived.

I`m sure things are very different today, with the emphasis on management rather than administration, but I`m still left with a feeling of apathy towards those who seek to spend their time as elected members of that organisation, so is it any wonder that I`ll give today`s election a miss especially as the choices on offer are less than compelling.   It`s the wrong decision, of course, but I confess to being underwhelmed by it all, despite the teachings of Plato........

A MISGUIDED GESTURE ?...

Now, I realise that what I am about to say may find disagreement with some who read these pages and I confirm absolutely that it is not my intention either to diminish the significance of recent events or to lessen the discomfort felt by any right minded person faced with the news of the wanton murder of Jo Cox, the MP for Batley and Spen.

Of course, on any scale, the fatal attack she suffered on the streets of Birstall is a tragedy for her family, her friends, colleagues and constituents and I certainly add my condolences and my sympathy to them.

But, it takes "a matter of major national importance" for the Government to ask the Speaker to recall parliament - something that has happened only 28 times since 1948, the last being in September 2014 to discuss events in Syria   But parliament is being recalled on Monday so that tributes can be paid to Jo Cox.   It is, of course, well meant and doubtless sincere but it might just call into question the wisdom of doing so for, admittedly, a much respected MP, a strident campaigner and, most important of all, a wife and mother, but who has only been an MP for a little over a year. 

With all respect to Jo Cox, the last time parliament was recalled in order to pay tribute to an MP was when tributes were paid to Baroness Thatcher.  The Party Leaders are perhaps right in describing Jo Cox`s murder as `an attack on democracy,` so it is also surprising that the Conservatives have decided not to contest the by-election for the vacancy in Batley and Spen caused by this tragic event, thus arguably compromising the very democracy they claim is `under attack.`.

Virtually every day someone somewhere in the UK gets murdered;  most go unnoticed, some even unrecorded in the media and most are dealt with quietly and with dignity by families, friends and by clubs or societies of which the deceased was a member.   And so I just wonder whether, on this occasion, the `club` that is Westminster might be a little misguided in their reaction to the appalling loss of one of their own? 

Not for the first time, I suspect I may be in a minority and possibly out of sync with the national mood.   Maybe I`m just getting older and older.....maybe it`s just me.

IT`S THE BISHOP !!..

Watch out.  The House of Bishops are issuing a letter to urge parishioners to vote at the General Election and are calling for a debate on issues such as nuclear defence and the economy.   The Bishops are expected to back the concept of a living wage and urge political parties to refrain from turning groups such as immigrants and those on benefits into scapegoats.   They are also expected to say that the case for the Trident nuclear deterrent needs to be re-examined and that more EU integration is needed.

Now, of course, the Bishops are not claiming to tell people how to vote but rather why people should bother to vote at all.   The Bishop of Buckingham, Dr. Alan Wilson, said that their letter was aimed at addressing the feeling of "cynicism and disenchantment with professional politicians" and to help voters "take a fresh look at things."

Sounds a bit plausible, but if their main aim in issuing the letter is simply to encourage people to think before they vote, then why not just say that, given that they should  say anything at all that might brand them with accusations of political interference?   As it is, the`shopping list` of issues they have quite openly referred to will surely make voters think that the Bishops have a political agenda all of their own.  Pity the law does not permit them to put up their own candidates. 

Such is my own cynicism and disenchantment that the only worry I have in making any sort of comment about Bishops and their ilk, is that I might find myself waking up in a future life as a Manchester United fan, which must surely be the ultimate in eternal damnation.  

A BETTER WAY ?..

I see today that MPs are calling for the days on which General Elections are held to be made public holidays so as to increase the number of people who turn up at polling stations.  The Commons Political and Constitutional Reform Committee said the move could help `restore greater esteem and excitement to the electoral process.`  The Committee is also calling for automatic registration and trials of voting via the internet, `with a view to voters having the choice of voting online at the 2020 General Election.`

Now it`s true, of course, that turnouts ate elections are pretty abysmal, ranging from around 10% for daft elections like those for Police and Crime Commissioners to still only 65% at the last General Election, so maybe something should be done to avoid the situation whereby that 65% meant that 16 million eligible voters failed to cast their ballot last time around.

But I wonder about the beezer wheeze of turning election days into public holidays. General Elections are normally held in May, just as the Spring sunshine, the lighter evenings and the longer days suggest that, rather than use the day to take part in the bureaucratic Victoriana of visiting polling stations, at least 16 million potential voters are more likely to head for the beach.

Now I have a feeling that the answer lies in the antipodes, where Oscar Hammerstein`s assertion that if you become a teacher, by your pupils you`ll be taught, could have its best example.   The right to vote is a freedom fiercely sought by people the world over, but Australians don`t have a choice.  Registering to vote and going to the polls are legal duties in Australia for citizens aged 18 and over and failing to do so can potentially result in a day in court and a fine.

But it seems to have public support and it seems to work - compared with the UK`s 65% voting at the last General Election, no less than 94% of Australian voters cast their votes in the country`s last Federal Election.   There is an ongoing debate in Australia about its voting system but Dr. Peter Chen, who teaches politics and Sydney University, confirms that there is no sign of any serious measures to end compulsory voting.

"Most Australians are quite comfortable with the electoral process," he says, "and would be quite suspicious of efforts to change it.  We trust the electoral system more than we trust our politicians."   Seems to me that, rather than introducing gimmickry such as public holidays, we should instead learn from our friends Down Under. 

ADDING INSULT TO INJURY..

This is Professor John Curtice, FRSA, FRSE, who is alleged to be what is intriguingly known as `an academic.`   He is currently Professor of Politics at the University of Strathclyde and is reported to be particularly interested in electoral behaviour and researching political and social attitudes.

He turned up last evening on BBC News 24 giving us the benefit of his wisdom following the local council election results.   He admitted that UKIP`s success had been `a remarkable achievement.   The party`s vote is proving to be highest in wards with more older people, fewer graduates and few ethnic minorities,` he opined.   He then went on to suggest that the reverse was true in London, where UKIP had not performed as well and where voters tended to be `more intelligent` than in the rest of the country.   Seriously. I`m fairly sure he didn`t make it up.

It`s really quite astonishing but perhaps not all that surprising that these remarks go unnoticed and unreported (possibly because not many people watch BBC News 24 midway through a Friday evening) but they strike me as being at least as offensive as anything we heard during the election campaign.   But I think what his comments do confirm is that London has almost become a country of its own, separated from the rest of the UK by its own unique `culture,` its own demography, its inward looking assumed entitlement and self importance.  

In Curtice`s world, it seems the rest of the UK is populated by dimwitted forelock-touching bumpkins who have failed to come to terms with the reality of life in modern day Britain. There might be an argument that suggests a generational divide as much as anything else, with an increasingly elderly population who find it difficult to acknowledge changes in social behaviour, but that does not mean that they are therefore less intelligent or perceptive than inhabitants of the great smoke.  They`re just older and having been injured by the crass assumptions that surfaced during the election campaign, they now find themselves insulted by the kind of sweeping assertions that could only come from `an academic.` 
  

MAD THURSDAY...

.....is looming large.  You can tell by the excruciatingly awful party election broadcasts appearing on television each night.   And we`ve had the polling cards shoved through the door and the party leaflets are beginning to appear in our letter box.   Do these people really expect me to display their posters in my window?  If so, I fear they are going to be disappointed.

Now in a former life I had quite a bit to do with elections of all kinds - Parish, District, County, Parliamentary, European - in various capacities ranging from humble Poll Clerk to humble Acting Returning Officer, so I`ve seen it all from the `other side` of polling day and it wasn`t always a pretty sight.   It always reminded me of when I was in my teens and I used to help out in my parents` pub when things got busy.  I was given tasks such as ensuring that the bottles of assorted beverages behind the bar were always stocked up for the voracious consumption by assorted patrons and experiences such as these had the effect of making the delights of bars and pubs less and less agreeable until it reached the point whereby I stopped drinking any sort of alcohol and haven`t touched a drop since.  Seeing the `other side` of things wasn`t always a pretty sight and just turned me off it all.

And so it is with the paraphernalia of elections - the canvassing, the red tape and sealing wax, the utter superficiality of party election literature and broadcasts but also - and perhaps most of all - the dubious qualities and doubtful motives of most of the candidates. It all reminds me of the late, great Dennis Potter and his timeless observation of `democracy at work` in his play Vote Vote Vote for Nigel Barton.  Nigel was someone who had stood unsuccessfully as a Conservative candidate and so became a Labour one in the following election.   Ring any bells, Mrs. Grant?

Now here in Dibley we only have an election for the European Parliament - it seems that the Parish, District and County Councillors are safely tucked away from exposure to the electorate for another year - but it seems we are going to be faced with a choice of the Usual Suspects - Tory, Labour, LibDem, UKIP, BNP, English Democrats - the list goes on but what seems to be missing is any cause worth voting for - most of them seem to be causes to vote against which is probably why UKIP will do rather well.

I`m surprised there isn`t a Football Party candidate as it seems to me that football is the single most important issue that concerns the voting public in modern day Britain, what with the Premier League, all the other leagues and this year`s World Cup, the news is dominated by the game and the comings and goings of players and managers.   Oh, and in other news, over 200 miners have died in Turkey and Chilcot still hasn`t published his report about the fiasco of Iraq.

Mad Thursday is looming large......but maybe it won`t be much different to any other day?

PROMISES, PROMISES..

There was an interesting exchange in the Commons yesterday during Deputy Prime Minister`s Questions, at the end of which Labour`s Deputy, Harriet Harman, accused the Coalition of being "two parties bound together in mutual fear of the electorate."   Nice turn of phrase but it seemed unfortunately timed on a day when Ed Milliband has virtually ruled out a referendum of Britain`s continued membership of the the European Union.

It`s just too boring to recount yet again the number of times we have been promised a referendum by the three main political parties, all of whom seem keen to deny the electorate the chance  despite not having had a say for getting on for half a century.   The cynic in me would suggest that, as ever, the politicians are denying the chance for their own ends rather than the clear wishes of those they purport to represent.

So, no referendum under Labour;  certainly not if the Lib Dems have any say in it;  the Conservatives might hold a referendum in 2017 if they are returned to power in next year`s General Election and if they have succeeded in renegotiating some undisclosed terms of the UK`s relationship with the EU which isn`t going to happen anyway following Angela Merkel`s announcement on her recent visit to London.   The only outfit who are really promising a referendum are UKIP who are unlikely to have much representation, if any, in the corridors of power anyway.

I suggest we just give up, accept that we should carry on paying £millions to the EU each and every day, let them decide most of the laws by which we are governed and not question the appalling waste of taxpayers` money or the unaccountability of their hopeless financial controls; but instead have a referendum about whether we should continue our association with the Eurovision Song Contest.   That`ll teach `em to meddle in the stuff that really matters!   Boom Bang a Bang Bang!!

ONE MAN ONE VOTE..

Expensive business, elections.   I heard the other day that the proposed referendum in Brighton about putting the Council Tax up by more than 2% was going to cost over £100,000, so goodness knows what the cost might be for running all the elections across the country - Parish Councils, District Councils, County Councils, General Elections, EU Parliament Elections and so on - but it must run into £millions.

But we may have thought it was a price worth paying to secure a squeaky clean democratic process;  so it`s more than disappointing to discover, thanks to Judge Mawrey`s research, that the present system of postal voting on demand may, in all probability, lead to unscrupulous vote rigging in certain parts of the country.   Then there is the absurdity of having the choice whether to vote or not.  Now that may be a long held matter of personal choice but recent very low turn-outs such as the election of Police Commissioners do call into question the validity of the outcome.

Now North Korea have sorted it out.  In their recent elections to the North Korean Parliament it`s reported that Kim Jong-Un was elected by 100% of the voters with 100% of eligible voters casting their votes.   The fact that he was the only candidate on the ballot paper can`t really disguise his enormous popular appeal, especially as there was at least an element of choice in the proceedings. The ballot papers gave the choice of voting for Kim Jong-Un or voting against, although the requirement to cast a `no` vote in a quite separate polling booth overseen by armed guards may perhaps have influenced some voters in their choice.

Perhaps, on balance, our very expensive and rather flawed system has its advantages after all.

WALK MY WAY ?...

This image could well represent Mrs. Snopper and me trudging our way to Dibley village hall to cast our votes in the Kent County Council elections.   For today is the day when we get a chance to vote although it`s been a difficult task to come to any real conclusion about who to support.   But thankfully the political party machines have done their work and made the decision easy for us.

The other day I had a visit from someone representing the Conservatives asking whether they could rely on my vote this time.   Now in this part of the world, the Conservative votes tend to be weighed rather than counted, so I was a bit surprised that they were sending outriders onto the streets to canvass voters.   And then we had the outburst from Ken Clarke declaring that UKIP has "fruitcakes, loonies, waifs and strays" in its ranks and among its supporters.   And since then there have been dire Tory warnings along the lines of `Vote UKIP - get Labour.`

And, of course, it didn`t take too long for the penny to drop and confirm that the Conservatives are clearly rattled by the prospect that UKIP might just become something of a more serious alternative to the cosy inevitability that has seen them rule the rural shires for so long.   Panic seems to have set in and they are probably right to be worried.

Their problem is, of course, that the attitudes displayed by the Ken Clarkes of this world, the dire threats and the Sunday morning visits all have the effect of driving undecided voters like me in UKIP`s direction, if only out of a sense of cussedness at being treated so patronisingly.

And if my reaction is typical of an undecided, frustrated generation at the antics of the Coalition Government across a range of issues then maybe I will not be alone in registering a vote against chucking £53million each and every day into the black hole of Brussels just so the European Union can tell us what to do in our own country.   Enough is more than enough and I`m not sure why but I can almost hear the words of Johnny Mathis, "Walk my way and a thousand violins begin to play," as I toddle to the polling station up the road..but then I always was a little misty.   

`EVENING ALL`

In 10 days time, we`ll be having the elections for the first ever Police and Crime Commissioners and this evening we had the first in a series of `discussions` on local tv featuring the candidates who have put themselves forward for the job here in deepest Kent.

Not a good start.   The were all more concerned with putting down their opponents with accusations flying about concerning the alleged `independence` of the candidates, all of whom, it seems despite protestations to the contrary, have either some direct or indirect connection with assorted political parties.  So much for keeping politics out of policing.  We heard nothing about the role they might play, the priorities they might attach, what qualifications they think they might possess and, to paraphrase the wonderful Mrs, Merton, what it is that is attracting them to the job with a salary of up to £100,000 a year.

But at least it provides some light relief from the endless prattle that is the election for the President of the USA.   If anything sums up the American psyche in the current world climate it is the money driven electoral paranoia of a nation more concerned with razzmatazz, show biz and celebrity than ever it is with the consequences for the rest of the world of whoever might be `elected.`

As with the Crime Commissioner campaign I`ll be heartily glad when it`s all over and done with.

WEIGH TO GO..

Well, my man finished a creditable third in the Dibley by-election on Thursday.   He beat the Labour candidate into fourth place and also finished ahead of the Terry/Lescott axis with the Groan Party coming last with a pretty miserable 29 votes.   So much for global warming/save the planet/scrap plastic bags and other heart-warming policies from our environmentally concerned brethren.

Inevitably, the contest was won by the desperately enthusiastic young Conservative candidate with the very liberal and democratic lady coming second.   Of course, it has to be remembered that this area of deepest Kent is something of a Tory heartland, full of affluent `communities` like the Stepford-esque Kings Hill, a string of picturesque villages stuffed full with yeoman stock and miles of rolling countryside awash with eastern European migrants picking the fruit from the mellifluous orchards and the picturesque  polytunnels.

So, no surprise really, since in these parts Tory ballot papers tend to be weighed rather than counted.   I imagine the local weighbridge is now back in full working order.

Better luck next time?