HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN...

I really thought that 4.2 million years of human existence had reached its nadir last week with large sections of the population roaming around searching for virtual icons on their mobile phones under the delusion that these things might actually exist in their areas of search.

And then my wife, a devotee of `Casualty,` discovers that last night`s episode of this gripping medical drama had been replaced by a `special edition` of Mrs. Brown`s Boys - a coarse, puerile, intelligence-insulting `entertainment` masquerading as comedy.  It`s both deeply unfunny and deeply troubling.

But then I reflect on the appointment of `Big` Sam Allardyce as the England football team manager and it`s clear that there is still a long way to go before the murky depths of human achievement are reached.  For years now any enthusiasm I had for the England football team has been gradually diminished not only by abject performances like the recent debacle in the European Championships but also by the antics of the overpaid poseurs representing the country on the world stage - the likes of Ashley Cole, John Terry, Wayne Rooney, etc. to mention just a few.   

But now they have a rival for my disquiet in the form of the aforementioned `Big` Sam. Now I know it`s an old fashioned notion - almost on a par with the Football Association`s determination to have an English manager - but I really would like our national team manager to represent the country in the eyes of the world with just a touch of dignity, modesty and restraint.  I know such virtues are in short supply with the majority of the players but now we have a manager for whom such qualities are conspicuous by their complete absence.

And so any enthusiasm or optimism I might have been nurturing over the new manager`s appointment have been cruelly dashed by the arrival of the charmless Sam whose claim to fame seems to consist of an ability to save teams from relegation rather than ever winning anything.   Still, he now has the support of his newly appointed assistant manager - none other than the unfathomable Sammy Lee.

So we have `Big` Sam and `Little` Sam in charge of our national destiny and I wonder why I am instantly reminded of the Chuckle Brothers.  Happy days.......