PROMISES, PROMISES....

So, the May Bank Holiday is behind us and it`s difficult to pick out anything truly memorable about it. By and large it`s not been a weekend for good news. But there was one item which lifted the spirits if only until reality took over.

The gossip emanating from the Westminster Village was all about the future of Prime Minister Gordon Benett. We had the Krankie-esque figure of `Communities Secretary` Hazel Blears, who at 4`10" conjurs up visions of being savaged by a ginger gerbil, admitting that Gordon didn`t do himself or `the party` any favours by his YouTube performance, only for her to `clarify` her statement later by insisting that it was not a criticism of Gordon. Then up popped Health Secretary, ex-postman Alan Johnson, to give the illusion that he wan`t interested in being Prime Minister but not actually saying so. And then there was our Deputy Prime Minister who likes to be known as The Rt. Hon. Harriet Harman, QC, MP who came on television to declare that she was happy to be a supporting deputy and wasn`t interested in becoming Prime Minister "and that`s the honest truth."

All of which tempts me to go off on a tangent and consider whether anyone in their right mind is the slightest bit interested in what any of these caricatures have to say, when all we really want them to do is shut up and go away. But I won`t go there, because another tangent is a little more appealing. Bear with me, dear reader.

I was talking the other day to a couple of my neighbours and the conversation came around, as it always seems to, to football. One is a Chelsea supporter and the other a fan of Ebbsfleet United in the Conference league. The Chelsea fan has a ticket for the return game against Barcelona, who are arguably the best club team in the world right now. Sensing disappointment for Chelsea, he declared that even if they lost, he wasn`t that bothered.

Ebbsfleet`s problems are different. They are a community club, owned by thousands of subscribers acound the globe and relying on their annual subscriptions of £35 each being renewed to ensure the club`s survival. As things stand, their prospects don`t look bright, but my sanguine neighbour declared that he wasn`t that bothered either.

Now, when I hear diehard fans say they`re not bothered about what happens to their club, I know then that they are very bothered indeed. And when I hear Harriet Harman say she doesn`t want to be Prime Minister, then I also have every reason to be very bothered indeed.