SNOPPER RETURNS TO FLURRY OF BOGIES

From Our Sports Correspondent

After a 10-months absence from the fairways of the world, Snopper made a long-awaited reappearance at a nearby golf course a week or so ago. Details have only recently emerged, but it seems Snopper was pleasantly surprised at the return of his powers by returning a card (just) in double figures!! Shrugging aside the restrictions imposed by anno domini and avoirdupois, he managed to complete the 18 holes at the picturesque Poult Wood Golf Complex, despite a complete absence of birdies or even pars, the onset of the occasional hail storm and the obvious distractions caused by his playing partner (pictured.)

But it`s his attitude to golfing failure that has endeared Snopper to his playing partner and his other friend. Now, normally, to go round bogeying each and every hole would be seen by some as a good time to quit, but not Snopper, who is made of sterner stuff and is possessed of a philosophical bent (sic.)

When he took up the game some years ago, it struck him then as being a tad expensive - clubs, shoes, appropriate `attire,` lessons, green fees, vast quantities of balls, to name just part of the initial outlay. So it seemed sensible that, having spent so much in starting out, he should try and hit the ball as many times as he could - value for money golf, he called it. And how successful it has turned out to be.

The other strand of Snopper`s philosophy is that, however hard you try, however much you improve and work at your game, there is always someone better; and this argument continues until you are Tiger Woods. As Snopper is not and is never likely to be Mr. Woods, he is able to shrug his shoulders and trudge on to the next tee confident in the knowledge that yet another bogey awaits him in the far distance.

FORE!!!