IT`S CATCHING ON..

A sense of keen anticipation encouraged me to sit down last evening and watch England`s European Championship qualifier against Switzerland.   As ever when watching England`s millionaire footballers and their £6million a year foreign coach, I defer to the flaw which resides deep within my troubled psyche and secretly hope that they get their just rewards by being humiliated in front of a sell-out crowd and a worldwide tv audience.   Not very patriotic, I know, but at least it`s an honest statement against the excesses at what is perceived to be the pinnacle of the game.

And last evening, I was not really disappointed when Engerland were more than held to a 2-2 draw against their cheese-making, yodelling, chocolatier minnow opponents for in truth the Swiss were the better team and were perhaps unfortunate not to take all three points.   Predictably, the reaction to yet another dismal performance by England has been universal in its condemnation but what was even more telling than the game itself were the post match interviews.

Now, I didn`t manage to catch them all (Barney was hankering for his evening walkies) but I did manage to hear manager Capello muttering darkly about being tired.   I also heard captain John Terry bravely shrugging off the tiredness copout but instead insisting, as he always seems to on these occasions, that `it just wasn`t meant to be.`   In saying so, of course, he is not just substituting one copout for another but also seeking to transfer any blame or responsibility for his team`s woeful performance to some mythical footballing deity somewhere in the firmament.   Someone or something  decides these things and thus leaves poor John and his buddies literally in the lap of the gods.

Trouble is, it`s catching on.   Ashley Young, scorer of England`s equalising second goal, seems to have been on the same FA/PFA post match interview course and has emerged with a first in the use of cliche, blandness and resigned indifference.   "It just wasn`t meant to be," he observed when questioned as to the reasons for England`s failure to win.

And you just knew that if Rio Ferdinand, Ashley Cole, Frankie Lamps or any of the other failed participants had been asked the same question, the answer would have been the same.   I guess it was just meant to be.