FRYING PANS AND FIRES

Well, that may be what some of the more deluded Pompey fans believe, but the truth is that Avram Grunt has been at Nottarf Krap for only a few months, during which time he successfully confirmed their relegation from the Premier League and, oh yes, succeeded in taking the team to the FA Cup Final at Wembley last Saturday where they were mercifully put out of their misery by Chelsea.

That journey to the `Home of Football` was, of course, made possible only by Portsmouth defying belief and the rightful attentions of the authorities by continuing to trade whilst insolvent (a criminal offence in any other `trade,`) buying players with money the club didn`t have and then not paying said players, Mr. Grunt and other staff, not to mention local florists and charities, for months on end, then going into administration with debts reported to be £140million and rising. Sounds awfully like bringing the game into disrepute.

So, what now for Avram, the true spirit of Pompey? Well, it seems he may be off to West Ham United, who themselves only narrowly escaped relegation, which cost the admirable Gianfranco Zola his job as their manager. Now, some of my very best friends are avid West Ham supporters and I have no wish to compromise that friendship in my comments about their beloved Hammers. However, that club seems to have come such a long, long way from once being, quite rightly, hailed as the Academy of Football via a succession of dubious managers and even more uncertain owners until now, when the club is owned by David Gold and David Sullivan who made their millions thanks to their burgeoning pornographic empire.

A slippery slope indeed for a club whose reputation perhaps needs more repairing than the two Davids are likely to provide. The recruitment of Avram Grunt may not help their rebuilding exercise either, for it was recently alleged that he was much taken with the services offered by a `massage parlour` on an industrial estate in Eastleigh and, in a profession where charisma is valued more highly than integrity, one has to question his chances of improving the image of affairs at the Boleyn.

But, for him, any form of escape from the madness of Pompey must come as more of a relief than was ever on offer in Eastleigh and I have a feeling he may be jumping from the Fratton Park frying pan straight into the incendiary fire of Upton Park. But, given all that has gone before at both clubs, he seems eminently suitable to become the True Spirit of present day West Ham United. I wonder what Ron Greenwood and John Lyall would make of it all.