`OWZAT?`

The news on the political front is just too depressing and frustrating for words, so I don`t propose to waste any here on the shambolic farce that our so called `government` has reduced itself to.

So, for a little light relief I turn - not for the first time - to the world of cricket, where the season is now in full swing. Not the frantic beer matches currently being played out in the 20-20 World Cup, but the more sedate, traditional County Championship, where `proper` cricket still has its place.

Now, given my background and upbringing, you would expect me to follow the fortunes of Hampshire County Cricket Club....and I do. Not always the most glamourous or successful, but invariably entertaining in both victory and defeat. And yesterday was no exception, when Hampshire suffered a comprehensive stuffing by an innings and 110 runs at the hands of County Champions, Durham. The last Hampshire batsman to be dismissed was Imran Tahir, who comes from the east of the county and who had the distinction of being given out, caught Mustard, bowled Onions. Seemed somehow to be a fitting finale to an inglorious defeat.

It reminded me of past occasions with the imperious Brian Johnston commentating on the fact that, during the 1981 Test against Australia, Dennis Lillee was dismissed - "Lillee, caught Willey, bowled Dilley." And perhaps even more so, the occasion when he informed the listening public that, "the batsman`s Holding, the bowler`s Willey." Cue collapse in the commentating box.

Such a shame that cricket`s laws don`t apply to politics, otherwise we might have seen a different result than Gordon Brown being given `not out` despite the fact that the voters have sent his stumps skittling in all directions.