THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN

You can always tell when the festive season is over when Prime Minister`s Questions reappears on our lunchtime tv screens. Today saw the return of the 600 plus MPs from yet another extended break from their parliamentary duties and it didn`t take long for hostilities to break out, as Gordon Brown faced questions for the first time in 2008.

(Brown)

And it didn`t take long for the yah-boo politics to come to the surface with Tory leader, Dave Cameron ripping into Gordon`s current stance on a whole range of headline-grabbing issues - ID cards, the economy, capital gains tax rates and other gripping stuff.

(Cameron)

Nick Clegg, newly elected leader of the LibDems, entered the fray for the first time and was encouragingly composed and incisive in his line of questioning. Fat lot of good it did him, though, for his questions about fuel bills received the same non-answers that Dave`s earlier questions did from Gordon.

(Clegg)

And all these fol-de-rols are supposedly controlled by the Speaker of the House of Commons, "Gorbals" Mick Martin, who looks down on proceedings with a kind of benign bewilderment, as if the world is going on around him and he has no power or intention to bring order to the chaos. Truly, it is no way to run a railroad.

(Steve Bucknor)

If only there were some kind of parliamentary ICC who could step in and suspend proceedings until order is restored. Maybe Steve Bucknor would be a better bet after all.