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YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST...

.....or maybe you didn`t.  Trials of the British Army`s new Ajax armoured vehicles have been halted for a second time following concerns being raised again over noise.  The Ministry of Defence confirmed that following these renewed concerns on the impacts of noise on the crews of these vehicles, "all Ajax trials have been suspended and will only resume when we are assured that mitigations are fully effective."

Earlier in the month it was reported that trials of Ajax armoured vehicles were halted at the end of last year to March this year due to excessive vibration and noise, leaving crews suffering from nausea, swollen joints and tinnitus.  

The Defence Minister, Jeremy Quin, visited the proving ground where independent testing has been conducted on Ajax and he commented, "This long running troubled programme requires ongoing intense work by our industrial partners and ourselves to ensure its delivery.  In achieving this, the safety of our personnel will always come first." Here`s the offending `vehicle`:-

So, let`s see if I`ve got this right.   The complaint is about how noisy these armoured vehicles are for the crews who have to man them and unless that problem is resolved no doubt the full force of the Health and Safety legislation will be brought to bear on the MoD.  Now, as a former 10th Hussar, I am familiar with and have been in close contact with armoured fighting vehicles and by their very nature they are noisy beasts and prone to the pitfalls of vibration.  They are not designed for comfort. 

The whole raison d`etre of having armoured fighting vehicles is that one day they might be called upon to play their part in not only training exercises, manoeuvres and the like, but also actual fighting in a theatre of war where the enemy might be bearing down and the conventions and dictates of health and safety legislation have absolutely no relevance whatsoever.

Do I detect another example of the eternal contradiction in terms that is military intelligence?

 

FULL CIRCLE...

No-one was more pleased than me to see the New Zealand cricket team becoming ICC World Test Champions following their eight wicket win in the final over India yesterday.   I have long been an admirer of most things Kiwi and before you think I`m just jumping on the bandwagon of their latest success, maybe I should explain the context for my delight at their win.

Back in the Summer of 1949 my parents took me to the old Hampshire County Cricket Ground at Northlands Road in Southampton, where Hampshire were playing the New Zealand tourists in a three day first class cricket match - the first one I ever saw.   I still remember their opening partnership of Bert Sutcliffe and Verdun Scott, their captain Walter Hadlee (father of Sir Richard) and it was a day that cemented my interest in cricket, in Hampshire cricket and in New Zealand - not a bad introduction to the truly beautiful game for me at the age of just ten. 

And in a kind of long distance, vicarious way I have followed their progress ever since - the ups and downs, the triumphs and disasters, the players who have come and gone over those 70+ years and it is in the last couple of years, of course, that they have reached arguably their highest levels of performance.   Two years ago they lost the limited over World Cup Final to England at Lord`s in what was the most dramatic way possible - a run-out on the last ball of the super over denying them the victory but they took it in good part, no histrionics, no complaints despite perhaps having cause for one or two to be lodged, nothing other than a dignified acceptance that sometimes these things happen.

And so against that background, yesterday the redemption came for them in a game that, thanks to the vagaries of the English Summer, went almost to the end of the reserve sixth day.  As ever, New Zealand were modest in their victory, India were themselves dignified in their acceptance of defeat in a game that exemplified the true spirit of cricket at the highest level.

So yesterday provided something of a landmark in my cricketing experience, not only because it was New Zealand but also because the Final was played at Hampshire`s new, spanking Ageus Bowl - not too far from Northlands Road but 70 years away from my tentative introduction to what cricket is all about.   Another full circle of life completed.

 

RUMOUR HAS IT ?...

I was intrigued to see that the Archbishop of Canterbury, the Extremely Reverend Justin Welby, had taken to the streets of Cambridge yesterday to become a `Big Issue` seller in order to publicise the Church of England`s efforts to cut homelessness.  In an interview with the magazine a while back, he criticised attitudes towards the homeless by successive Tory governments.

During his `Big Issue` flogging stint he said that, "Tackling poverty together is the essential work of a society where every person is truly valued."   As far as homelessness is concerned, he declared that "homelessness is an issue that matters profoundly to God."  So, rather than it being a rumour put around by people with nowhere to live, the issue of homelessness seems to be in good hands.  

Be that as it may, the Church of England is one of the country`s biggest landowners with an enormous estate which includes properties in villages, towns and cities across the country as well as over 100,000 acres of land in England and Wales.   Its property portfolio is worth at least £2billion and accounts for over a third of the £7billion assets it holds.  A few years ago, a report by the Centre for Theology & Community and the Christian campaigning group Housing Justice proposed that the Church of England `needs to put its house in order and sell off some of its land in response to Britain`s housing crisis.`

Perhaps it`s high time they acted on that advice - or are they waiting for Head Office to sort it out for them?   Asking for a friend.

 

It was a cold, gloomy, overcast day yesterday - hardly in keeping with the alleged `height of Summer`, but the day being Fathers Day my eldest son and I treated ourselves to another visit to Canterbury where Kent were to play Essex in the T20 cricket in what had been dubbed the battle of the bridge - the one which separates the two counties as it spans the Thames.   I suppose the tussle of the tunnel might have been equally as eloquent but it all added to the hype surrounding these T20 Blast games.

Kick-off was supposed to be at 2.30pm but heavy overnight rain delayed proceedings for an hour, leading to play beginning at 3.30pm.   To be fair, the ground staff and the umpires did well to get the game under way at all, so it was a bit of a surprise that, having won the toss, Essex decided to field first.  That suited Kent rather well and they hammered the Essex bowling for 236 for 3, their highest score in the T20, thanks to 69 from Zak Crawley, 88 from Daniel Bell-Drummond and an undefeated 42 from Jack Leaning.

In reply Essex made a decent start but in the end were no match for Kent`s bowling attack and athletic fielding, reaching 169 all out to secure Kent yet another T20 victory this time by 67 runs.  The in-form Leaning not only added to his batting display earlier on but displayed his bowling prowess by taking 3-15 in two overs and also taking a quite stunning catch off his own bowling - surely a man-of-the-match all round performance.

So, despite sitting in the gathering gloom, the cold of the day had turned into the comfort of a resounding and altogether convincing Kent win.  Nice one.   But the thing about going to the cricket especially in a traditional ground like Canterbury is that whilst the game itself may be the reason to go there, there is so much more to it than that.  Even for the relatively short duration of a T20 game nevertheless it becomes something of a day long expedition and you have to be prepared for any eventuality.

So we took a selection of clothing which helped but did not quite defeat the inclemency of the English mid Summer and also enough food and drink to keep us going.  And it`s here that people have choices.   Some go the whole hog and come prepared with a considerable array of delicacies;  others prefer to buy burgers and chips from the attendant burger bar; whilst those like me go more for - how shall I say? - cordon noir?  My own sustenance on this occasion consisted of a pork pie, a tomato, an excellent Eccles cake courtesy of Messrs. Marks and Spencer, a penguin (the chocolate variety) and a flask of hot coffee.

I noticed too the attitude of the assembled sell-out crowd when confronted with the announcement of a delay before the umpires would inspect the pitch to see if play could begin.  This was met with a kind of resigned acceptance, a collective shrugging of the shoulders, leading most to invade their packed lunches and while away the time with polite discourse.   Had the same thing happened at a football match, I imagine there would have been a riot.

So, in the end another excellent, enjoyable and rewarding day successfully negotiated -  even if it was comforting to get back in the car and turn the heating up.   

 

LOOSE CONNECTIONS...

Big day in the Euro Footy Thing with England playing Scotland at Wembley this evening. I should perhaps be more excited than I am but I confess to a degree of ambivalence.  It is, of course, high Summer - the cricket season - and domestic competitive football was supposed to have come to an end.  Well it hasn`t quite - there`s still the play-off final for promotion from the National League to the English Football League between Torquay United and Hartlepool to come this weekend and on the international stage the finals of Euro 2020 drone on despite being a year late.

Tonight`s game is billed as the oldest international ever and so has with it some history and tradition not a million miles away from Bannockburn in its intensity and deep rivalry.  Not so much a football match, more a re-enactment.

I suppose the reasons for my ambivalence are twofold.  First, it`s interfering with what Summer should really be about but secondly because, with the dumping of James Ward-Prowse from the England squad, my Southampton based interest has been replaced by what loose connections with the Saints I can find.  I guess three of our Academy graduates, Luke Shaw, Tyrone Mings and Ben White will play for England although they each went off to other clubs.   Scotland will have current Saints midfielder Stuart Armstrong and striker Che Adams who now qualifies to play for Scotland thanks to his grandparents apparently going there on holiday once.

All very tenuous links for me to encourage any real interest in the game or the outcome and so I`ve been looking at more compelling examples of Southampton`s influence on this fixture.   And it doesn`t get any better - any more romantic - any more inspiring than the England debut of Rickie Lambert Southampton`s Goal Machine (RLSGM) scoring the winning goal against Scotland at Wembley in 2013.    Here it is:-

Unforgettable !

 

A lot going on yesterday.  The Euro Footy Thing, the BBC`s unconvincing self-flagellation about the Martin Bashir fiasco and the report of the Inquiry into the alleged `institutionalised  corruption` in the Met. which led to no-one being brought to justice for the murder of Daniel Morgan 34 years ago.   It was a truly damning report, eight years in the making following all kinds of obstruction and delay and delivered with a measured authority by the Inquiry Chairperson, Baroness Nuala O`Loan.

Following its publication there were questions in the House and the Home Secretary turned up to  make an announcement.  She has written to Met. Police Commissioner Cressida Dick asking for a full and detailed response to the recommendations in the report.  Meanwhile, the Home Secretary herself might have some questions to answer about the apparent delay in publishing the report.

In a written statement last night, Commissioner Dick said that the failure to bring Mr. Morgan`s murderer to justice was a "matter of deep regret.  Our mistakes have compounded the pain suffered by Daniel`s family - for that I apologise again now."   (I suppose we`re used to those in charge of big organisations coming out with the stock response about lessons being learned to ensure that this can never happen again - I was surprised this wasn`t included in the written statement, but give it time....)

Sometimes it seems that sorry is the easiest word and so becomes meaningless.  Nonetheless it was nice to see that the Met. is sorry about that, so that`s alright then.

Jed Mercurio rides again?

 

AN EVENING AT THE CRICKET..

To Canterbury and I`m feeling privileged to have been the guest of a member of Kent County Cricket Club for the game against Gloucestershire at the sainted St. Lawrence Ground last evening.  It was the first T20 game I had attended so it was a new experience - one so much better than just watching it on the television.

As ever with Kent CCC the administration and organisation of the event was admirable given the restrictions imposed by friend Covid and his variant chums and I was again struck by the difference in attitude towards `customers` at cricket - where we were treated courteously and felt welcome - and football, where you really are felt that you should be grateful for being allowed to be there.

It was 20 overs each side;  Kent batted first and did well to reach 183 for 5 despite a faltering start which was rescued by some attractive stroke play by Jack Leaning`s invaluable 81 not out.  In reply, Gloucestershire were within a whisker of winning the game, needing just 10 runs from the last over but were denied by the bowling of unexpected hero Fred Klaassen who took two wickets with his first two balls of the final over which ended with Gloucestershire reaching 178-8 and leaving Kent winning by 5 runs.

We sat in the first row of the Cowdrey Stand, over the boundary ropes at cow corner and had a splendid view of proceedings as you can see from my photo above.  Perhaps the only thing that marred our enjoyment was the constant noise from the loud speakers just above us each time a wicket fell, a boundary was scored or a six cleared the ropes.  I called it noise rather than music because it seemed to consist of up tempo rappy style stuff which was lost on me although I understood the appropriateness of one or two snippets such as `Don`t look back in anger` as a dismissed Gloucestershire batsman trudged wearily back to the pavilion.   

For me and those of my ilk I understand the need to hype up the T20 `experience` with things like that but if they must do it perhaps we - especially in the hallowed Cowdrey Stand - could be serenaded with Mahler`s Adagietto or at least send opposition batsmen on their way with Mozart`s Lacrimosa from Don Giovanni.  That might just put the icing on a very sumptuous and enjoyable cake.

Next up, Essex at Canterbury on Sunday with a 2.30 kick-off - I`ll take my earplugs.

 

HOME FROM HOME ?

This photo was obviously taken on a nice day but my mind goes back to the bleak mid winter of 1960, when the snow was on the ground, the days were short, the nights seemingly endless and a keen biting wind whipped across the outposts of Catterick Camp from the North Yorkshire wilderness.  We new recruits to National Service had by early March completed our `basic training,` so we could now move forwards, turn left and right, clean kit, shoot things and we had become used to the verbal and psychological ranting of drill sergeants and upstart corporals. 

We were then relocated to the edge of Catterick Camp to do our `trade training,` which might have consisted of things like signalling, driving military vehicles, completing various tests, coming to terms with the vagaries of `good order and military discipline` and all the while being accommodated in blocks very much like the one in the picture above.  There were about 20 or so of us in one of these buildings so not much room and no real privacy.  The `facilities` were basic and, being mid winter, it was bitterly cold inside as well as outside.  There was one stove type heater in the middle of the room which was woefully inadequate to provide any heating - even if there had been a supply of coal to get it going. 

But for all of that, it never ever crossed our minds to complain.  No point really, no-one would take any notice and I suspect there would have been `consequences` for having the temerity to grumble about anything.

So I`m intrigued by the notion that people who enter this country illegally - and so shouldn`t be here anyway - do have the temerity to complain about the accommodation they are offered whilst their situation is being assessed, allegedly deliberately setting fire to some of the accommodation, instructing lawyers at taxpayers` expense to lodge formal complaints, suing the government for the alleged inadequacy of their accommodation and now demanding that the Home Secretary resigns as the accommodation they complain about is still being used.   Not sure you could make it up.

I wonder what the heroic and thoroughly admirable Ghurkhas make of it all

 

A SHREWD INVESTMENT ?

Quite a few years ago we had a two or three holidays in Carbis Bay in West Cornwall.  We stayed in a nice bungalow in Treloyhan Park Road which looked out across the bay towards Godrevy Lighthouse.  It was a pleasant stroll from there to St. Ives one way and to Carbis Bay itself the other way and just up the road there was a Tesco store in the most agreeable location imaginable - it also had a view of the sea and the neighbouring countryside - so all in all it was a good place to stay.

This week of course Carbis Bay is being taken over by the G7 meeting of heads of state from across the world and I have been catching up on events leading up to the summit by watching the BBC`s Spotlight programme for the south west each evening (channel 967 on Sky.)  And it is quite remarkable what`s going on down there - a ring of steel (literally) has been erected around the most sensitive bits of Carbis Bay and the two hotels which will be accommodating the world leaders;  there are navy vessels patrolling St. Ives Bay;  bits of the south west coast path are blocked off;  the railway service from St. Ives to St. Erth via Carbis Bay has stopped working and 5,000 police and hundreds of security personnel are guarding the area.

One wonders why on earth the G7 summit is being held in this idyllic holiday destination in the midst of the holiday season as well as the pandemic.  The question having been duly begged, it turns out that Boris Johnson used to go on holiday in his grandparents house in Carbis Bay, his Dad was born there and anyway Boris likes it.  But one wonders too what the native Cornish residents think of it all.

I guess some are putting up with it for the economic benefits it will bring but I suspect that the majority of Cornish folk simply view it as yet another invasion by `emmets.`  I first came across the `emmet` label on another visit to Cornwall - this time to the fishing village of Cadgwith where I saw the sign pictured above on one of the cars in the village car park.  It struck me that a Cornishman was making it clear that he (it could have been she of course) was from those parts and was proud to confirm his independence.   Good for him (or her) I thought along with the notion that how good it must be to originate from a place with such tradition, history and unique culture.

So, what does the word emmet really mean?  Well, ironically, it`s not even Cornish but is commonly thought to derive from the Cornish language word for `ant.`  Tourists and visitors to the area are often red in colour and they mill around in large gatherings - you get the analogy - but the use of emmet is actually derived from the Old English word aemete, from which the modern English word `ant` comes.  The Cornish word for ant is moryenenn, the plural of which - moryon - is still used in the very far west of Cornwall instead of emmet and it`s not too far away from sounding like moron - for yet another analogy.

For decades, if not for centuries, Cornish folk have used `emmet` often in an affectionate way.  However in more recent times there seems to be a growing feeling that the term is derogatory, divisive and even racist.  Well, we do live in a wokey world but the world leaders and their entourages, the zillions of police, security and media people attending the G7 event might be well advised to invest in a stock of non-emmet stickers, just in case.

 

QUESTIONABLE DECISIONS...

First an apology for being absent from these pages for a week or so - entirely due to matters beyond my control but good to be back and thank you to those aficionados who have enquired about my whereabouts.   Anyway, here we go again.

And I resume normal service by referring to two decisions taken over the weekend concerning sporting issues.   The first is the selection of the England squad to compete in the upcoming European Championships which begin at the end of the week.  And being a Saints fan my first gripe is about the apparent omission of Southampton captain James Ward-Prowse despite his really quite impressive performance in the last two pre-tournament `friendlies.`  

It was plain for all to see that his abundant energy, his relentless pressing, incisive passing and dead ball brilliance would bring something a little different to the options open to manager Gareth Southgate.  But no, instead Southgate has preferred Liverpool captain Jordan Henderson who has not played a full game since mid-February and is clearly less than match fit.  In addition he displayed his usual arrogance by donning the captain`s armband, pulling rank over Dominic Calvert Lewin, the designated penalty taker, and promptly missed the one penalty chance he was given with a tame effort that summed up his performance in the time he was on the pitch.

Trouble is, he plays for one of the `big six` - you remember them, the ones who were prepared to tear up competitive football in favour of a closed shop European Super League. I feel more than a trifle miffed for Jame Ward-Prowse who, of course `only` plays for Southampton.  The rascal in me hopes in a way that Southgate`s decision comes back to haunt him.

The second questionable decision concerns England cricket`s new man Ollie Robinson who made an impressive debut in his first test match for England in the drawn game against New Zealand.  The storm broke around him when somehow a couple of 10-year old tweets that he put on Twitter were apparently deemed sexist and/or racist in nature.  Once this came to light, Robinson issued a prompt, heartfelt and genuine apology for something he did all those years ago when he was still a teenager.

Never mind all that, the ECB have banned him from international cricket `pending an investigation` so Robinson has left the England camp and trudged back to Sussex, his playing county.  I was not surprised to hear that Culture Secretary Oliver Dowden has queried the ECB decision of which I hope there is a swift reversal very quickly.   Now when I was 18 or 19, despite Twitter and its ilk not having been invented, I`m pretty sure I did and said a few things that were of their time and in hindsight likely to have caused some offence to some people.   But such is the innocence and inexperience of youth and I would have hoped that Robinson` apology and regret would have been accepted so we can all `move on,` as they say.

(Preview alert ::  Also in my enforced absence some other `issues` have come to light which might encourage me to rant about but which might also impact on those of a sensitive nature.  Watch this space.....or not, a the case may be.)