FEELING A BIT SICK....

A weekend to forget really.  As well a myself, I feel also for my long suffering neighbour, the well known Gillingham fan.   His team were in action yesterday in the FA Cup Second Round at home to Exeter City but sadly, despite a stirring fightback in the dying moments of the game, went down 3-2 thus missing the chance of a money spinning Third Round tie.  

As I write, I am recovering from the mental health issues brought on by Southampton also losing 3-2 at home this afternoon against a resurgent Manchester United.   Despite being 2-0 up at half time, the Saints were pegged back in the 92nd minute by Edinson Cavani`s winner.  I should not really be too disappointed, as that defeat brought an end to Saints` seven game unbeaten run and still leaves them fifth in the Premier League table.  But if there is one team that I hate to lose to, it is Manchester United - ever since the Fergie days they have exuded an air of entitlement and arrogance which encourages disaffection.

No matter, for I can look back on times gone by when the Saints have managed to overcome them, notably being at St, Mary`s about 20 years ago when James Beattie`s towering header in the 88th minute encouraged me to celebrate by driving home via Portsmouth with my Saints flag billowing defiantly from the car window.

In other news, Forest Green Rovers didn`t have a game as they were already denied a place in the FA Cup this weekend;  Stoke Gabriel and Truro City have yet to resume hostilities in their respective leagues, as fixtures are on hold thanks to Mr. Covid;  Fort William were due to play their first league game of the season yesterday but that game was postponed `due to waterlogged pitch;` and I can find no trace of Maidstone United having played this weekend either.

So it`s all a bit disappointing.  No wonder I feel a bit like that parrot.

 

THIS WILL ONLY WORK TODAY..

Don`t really know why but I have long been fascinated by numbers, which is strange because I was hopeless at it at school.  But in later life my enquiring mind has drifted into all kinds of subjects that I overlooked in my school days - things like astronomy, physics, art history and mathematics.   And it was in maths that I came across some remarkable facts about number 26.  Here are a few obscure ones:-

* Walt Disney has won 26 Oscars - the most ever.

* The number 26 appears only once in the entire bible;

*Theodore Roosevelt was the 26th President of the United States;

*It takes 26 moves or less to solve a Rubik`s Cube;

*There are 26 red cards and 26 black cards in a deck of cards:

*There are 26 bones in a human foot.

.........and so on; there are more - I won`t bore you - but what is so very special about 26 is this - it is the only number in the whole panoply of numbers from one to infinity and beyond which is sandwiched between a squared number and a cubed number (25 = 5x 5; 27 = 3 x 3 x 3) and it was Pierre de Fermat - he of the famous last theorem - who not only discovered this fact but also provided a proof for it, which turned out to be infinitely more difficult than the fact itself. 

But more to the point - and the reason this post of mine will only work today - is because today we are 26 days away from the shortest day and the longest night of the year.  And if, like me, you happen to be a miserable old git, fed up with dark, the onset of `the season of goodwill` and clinging on to the earnest hope that we will come through this winter, have a vaccine and live happily ever after, then you will understand.

If not, you might reach the conclusion that I might be bonkers.  You might be right.

 

WORD OF THE YEAR ?

Amongst the world of lexicography there have been a number of candidates for 2020`s word of the year.  For example, Collins` Dictionary went for `lockdown` but the Oxford University thought there were too many candidates to choose from, so they suggested a whole list of words that have become familiar to us this year - most of which appear in the picture above.

Got me thinking though, as to whether I might be able to identify just one word that has annoyed me this year by its misuse and I think that word has to be `incredible.`  My own slimline volume of Collins` Dictionary defines `incredible` as `hard to believe or imagine` but I have lost count of the number of times things, events, people have all been described as `incredible` when they might simply have been `very` - incredibly talented = (`very?`)

I suppose it depends on the context in which words become accepted as the norm.  In football, not just words but whole phrases become part of the lexicon - `a difficult place to go to,` `he`ll be disappointed with that,` `a game of two halves.` 

But I noticed that although religion seems to have an impenetrable language of its own, it has now adopted the device of saying one thing whilst meaning another.  For example, I read over the weekend that the Archbishop of Canterbury, the Extremely Reverend Justin Welby is going to take a three months sabbatical next year for ` reflection, prayer and spiritual renewal.`  Well, good for him.  I don`t begrudge him his time away from the stresses of his job, but why not just call it a holiday?

Incredible.

NO CONTEST...

The photo above shows the Apollos astronauts off in the moon buggy to collect samples of moon dust and gravel.  It was a successful mission and one which brought universal admiration of the courage, skill and tenacity to make it an extraordinary achievement.   

Now you may be wondering why I have chosen to write about this.  Well, I confess to have been interested in things to do with space, time, the universe and everything.  I guess it`s having an enquiring mind but from boyhood I have been fascinated and continually puzzled by the subject.  I remember even as a boy I was asking questions about the universe and the enormity of space and time.  For example, I pondered about the boundaries of space and time - when you reached the end of space, was there a big wall with a sign saying `End of Space, Turn Back?`  But if there was nothing beyond that wall, the surely in that case nothing becomes something and space just keeps on going.  I`m sure there is a sensible explanation but has it been proven?  You get my drift.

Over many years, I have followed the Apollo Missions, the first moon landing, the drama of Apollo 13, the confirmation  of black holes, the Hubble Space Telescope and the construction of the International Space Station.  And just recently, of course, the successful docking of four astronauts to spend the next six months carrying out experimentation to further enhance mankind`s understanding of the universe. (I go along with the notion that mankind`s continual intellectual development is part of the process by which the universe can understand itself. But then I would, I guess.)

In a recent conversation with my youngest son we touched on the UK`s contribution towards this greater understanding and he recalled the insights, the wisdom and the philosophy behind the approach taken some years ago now by the television series `Modern Toss.`   In that series there were episodes of a recurring theme describing what happens when arguments break out between the UK astronauts and with ground control.

I will include just one brief episode by way of illustration but before revealing it I should apologise for any unfortunate language that you may hear;  it is, however, central to the context of the piece but if you feel you are likely to be offended then please do not click on this link.   If you do want to run the risk, please highlight the link, right click and an option appears to `go to`..... 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1w2zL1qCtVU

 No contest, I`m sure you will agree.  Two final thoughts.  The first is that I have clearly brought my son up in the right way and despite being in his 50s he still retains the family penchant for enquiring minds.

Lastly, another apology.  Earlier on in this post I referred to `mankind` once or twice.  I do apologise for this oversight and I accept that I should have referred either to womankind or personkind or maybe even just kind.  I hope you will forgive my use of `outdated language.`

  

 

It`s been a curious weekend.  One of those when fate decrees that not much goes right and this weekend was really one of those.

Now like all decent, caring souls I was shocked to see Tiger Woods struggle so gamely on the par 3 12th hole at Augusta, where after a series of disasters and frequent visits to the water he eventually took ten shots to complete the hole.  But I guess like a few other hopeless golfers, I confess that any sympathy I may have had turned into a kind of smirking gratification because I have done that on many occasions - not at Augusta of course but at a selection of mainly public courses throughout Kent and elsewhere.  So thank you, Tiger, even though he ruined it all by birdying the last five holes. Spoil sport.

And congratulations go to Lewis Hamilton on his spectacular achievement of equalling Schumacher`s seven world championships.  A phenomenal driver, Hamilton, with a super dooper whizzo car and the best technical team money can buy. But he deserves all the plaudits that come his way along with the inevitable knighthood.   Just a shame that he is top dog in a `sport` which must be the most environmentally hostile, noisiest and boring ever invented.

On to football and again not a happy outcome, starting with England losing 2-0 to Belgium and thus not qualifying for next year`s European Championship Finals.  Pity that the Saints pairing of Danny Ings and James Ward-Prowse had to withdraw from England duty because of injury.   Close by to Southampton, Eastleigh`s home game against Hartlepool in the National League was abandoned at half time due to `torrential rain.`  At least Hartlepool  had 45 minutes of football for their 600 mile round trip but my neighbour`s Gillingham had their game against Lincoln inexplicably postponed due to `international call-ups.`  

Maidstone managed to lose 2-0 at home to league leaders Dartford and Fort William emerged from their hibernation by losing only 4-0 to Rothes in a pre-season friendly.  Truro City are still out of action, as are Stoke Gabriel - both victims of the Covid lower league suspensions.

So, not a great sporting weekend but at least we`ve had the shenanigans in Downing Street to bring some `entertainment` to proceedings - well it would be entertaining if it wasn`t so serious - and the triumph of Prime Minister Carrie and her kitchen cabinet over the desperation of her consort Boris and his now departed henchmen.   I still think we would be better served by Joanna Lumley being in charge of everything.....or Dame Judi Dench...or Ann Hayden Jones and her husband Pip.  

 

MAYBE IT`S JUST ME ?

I guess this post might not be too popular but here goes anyway.   Maybe it`s the time of the year and all the grim reality that comes with it.  Darkness has descended in more ways than one - the Covid thingy, the Brexit trade business; the absurdity of Donald Trump - but also it`s the season of annoying things.  We`ve had annoying Halloween, we`ve had annoying Bonfire night, Christmas is coming and the goose would rather it didn`t:   but it`s also the season of charity fund raising.  

Now as a veteran of National Service and as the son of a father who spent five years in a relentless Nazi Stalag during WW2 which culminated in the long death march, all of which deeply affected the rest of his life that ended so abruptly, you can understand why I support charities such as the Royal British Legion and the Salvation Army.   But I find myself at odds with a number of charities that seem to prey on the sensitivities of folk who perhaps should know better - or who feel pressurised into thinking they should contribute otherwise what would people think of them.

Here goes with the controversial bit, today of all days.  You see, I put the BBC`s Children in Need appeal in that category alongside things like Red Nose Day and those countless appeals on television that play the sympathy card when they ask you to send £3 a month to adopt a polar bear or some other creature that would have you for lunch given half a chance.  

It may simply be the case that I don`t like the BBC, which is true, but I do find it annoying when so called celebrities put themselves in embarrassing situations, perform cringeworthy antics and demand that you give to the worthy cause - and I agree it may be worthy it`s just the way they go about it that will encourage me to turn over this evening and watch the rugby union on ITV instead.

I think my `disenchantment` towards all this must have begun back in the day of Feed the World, that summer night at Wembley when the less than appealing  Bob Geldof screamed and shouted into the tv camera and demanded that people should `give us the money.`  Not a happy experience which seemed to set the pattern of `celebrity demands` rather than considered encouragement.

As for me, lest you might think otherwise, I do give to charity;  I do so willingly and to those charities that I think deserve my support.  It`s my decision, made freely rather than the result of feeling threatened or belittled into making a donation.

Maybe it`s just me?  Well, at least I`m honest about it.

 

Quite a few years ago now, I got to realise that life won`t go on forever however much I might like it to.  I don`t know why but the reality suddenly dawned on me and I became aware of my own mortality.  And that prompted me to reassess a few things and one of the less appealing was to consider how (rather than when) I might choose to kiss this crazy world goodbye.

I considered a number of options, some rather touching, others perhaps bordering on the bizarre but in the end it came down to a choice between two conflicting but compelling alternatives.  The first was to part company on the golf course, ideally having just birdied the notoriously difficult par 5 fourth hole at Poult Wood Golf Course - always a difficult place to go to.  In all the years I hacked my way around that course I don`t think I ever parred that hole, so to expire with a birdie in the hand would be a fitting tribute to my golfing inadequacy.   Won`t happen now, of course - my dodgy knee has seen to that.  Oh well

The second choice naturally involved Southampton Football Club which I have followed assiduously since my father first took me to The Dell in 1946, when I was seven.  I began to think how fitting it would be for me to expire gracefully just as the Saints beat Manchester United in the Champions League Final at Wembley but I soon settled for them to be heading the Premier League table, leaving the rest of English football floundering in their wake.

At 10.00 pm or thereabouts on Friday evening, Southampton were top of the Premier League, having beaten Newcastle United 2-0 with a deserved victory and that was the first time in 32 years that the Saints had achieved the pinnacle of the top flight of English football (the Premier League hadn`t been invented then, so it was the old First Division.)

But now as I write Leicester City have just beaten Wolves to dislodge the Saints from top spot - in fact, as Spurs have also won this afternoon, the Saints have now slumped to third in the table.   But those 42 hours at the top were in one way piquant, precious and sumptuous;  but in another left me wondering whether the excitement of it all might actually have made my chosen departure manifest itself.

Thankfully, nothing untoward happened, my heart rate has returned to normal and I`m still here, as you might deduce from the fact that I`m writing this.  So my two initial choices have come and gone and I had better think of a few more departure lounges that might appeal - but perhaps I had better avoid golf and football and turn my mind to something else.  Oh well.

 PICURES PAINTING MORE THAN WORDS...

Well, please forgive me but I`m enjoying it while it lasts.

 

A GOOD IDEA?

So, here we are on yet another day of widespread confusion, uncertainty and bewilderment. There are lots of examples to choose from.   There`s the corona virus thingy seemingly getting worse to the point whereby we are now entering our second national lockdown with all the restrictions and impositions that it brings.  And although HM Gov. has made a solemn promise that it will end on 2nd December, how can they say that when at this distance nobody can possibly know what the situation will be by then?  And as to what this lockdown might mean in practice and in detail, there is yet more confusion and uncertainty.  I`m driven to conclude that HM Gov really is making it up as they go along.

What with that and the Brexit Trade deal talks going round in circles - remember Brexit? - along with events in the good ol` US of A (see below) might all conspire to present any opportunistic anti-west dictator with a golden opportunity to strike while the iron is hot and the eyes of the west are diverted elsewhere.   

There have been a couple of worrying things on the football front (my priorities never vary) with the news that Saints ace striker Danny Ings has had to have a minor operation on his knee which might keep him out for four to six weeks, thus denting our chances of a European spot at the end of the season.   I`ve sent his knee a get well card hoping that might help. 

And last night our street`s local hero Scott ("pacy flanker") Wagstaff had to come off at half time with a hamstring problem, despite which it has to be said that his chums went on to win 2-1 against Leyton Orient to propel Forest Green Rovers up to third in the League Two table.  He is likely to miss Saturday`s FA Cup game away at Lincoln City, whose ground Sincil Bank is a notoriously difficult place to go to.  We here at the news desk wish Scotty a swift recovery.

And then we are also locked in the confusion and uncertainty surrounding the American Presidential Election.  The outcome matters, of course, because either Donald Trump or Joe Biden will have their finger on the nuclear button, which is perhaps more of a concerning prospect than which ever of them is eventually declared the winner.  The way the election is organised and conducted seems to be confusing and bewildering to onlookers across the world - it ain`t no way to run a railway, that`s for sure.

All of which reminds me of the famous reply given by Mahatma Gandhi who, when asked what he thought of western civilisation,  said that he thought it would be a good idea.

 

THE PRECIOUS HOURS...

It`s early Sunday evening.  And right now this is how the Premier League table is looking following Southampton`s 4-3 win away at Aston Villa.  Carry on like this and the Saints could replicate the last time I can recall us being so high in the Premier League table.   From memory, that was about 20 years ago when Southampton beat Manchester United 1-0 in an early season game thanks to a very late James Beattie header.  Two things I remember from that euphoric time.

The first was manager Gordon Strachan`s reaction when being asked by a reporter what he was going to do to celebrate.  He replied that he was going home to switch on the teletext and stare at the league table all evening.   The second is that, in a fit of adult childishness, I drove home via Portsmouth so that I could career through the streets of our rivals with my Saints banner flying.

The bizarre thing is that if Southampton beat Newcastle in Friday night`s upcoming game, they will go top of the Premier League, if only temporarily.   The last time that happened was in the 1988/89 season! Perhaps a few more precious hours await.

A quick look at results for the other teams I`m following.  Let`s start with life at the other end of the pyramid, where Stoke Gabriel`s epic struggles continue in the South West Peninsula League First Division East.  A visit to Honiton Town saw yet another defeat for the Railwaymen - this time 17-2, but at least they have now increased their goal tally to five for the season (although they have now conceded 187, leaving them with a goal difference of minus 182.)   

Our street`s local hero Scott ("Eco-Friendly") Wagstaff was unable to prevent Forest Green Rovers going down 2-1 away at local rivals Cheltenham Town;  but then Whaddon Road is always a difficult place to go to.   Maidstone United clinched an impressive 6-0 win at home against Concord Rangers to go third in the National League South but I drew blank sheets in the search for the fortunes of Truro City and Fort William, nether of whom seemed to have a game this weekend.  As for Gillingham, perhaps it`s for the best that I make no comment on their current form, for fear of causing yet more anxieties for my next door neighbour.

But as I fast forward and round off this round up, thanks to other results in the Premier League,  Southampton have now dropped to fourth spot but those few hours in third were  precious indeed and bode well for a season that, for once, may neither bring the spectre of relegation battles nor, indeed, yet another assault on my own mental health wellbeing. 

I`ll call you if I need you, Nurse. Don`t wait up.